When I used to hear the word “goal,” a part of me shriveled. My mind would sneer, “Yeah, yeah, I know I need to make goals! Goals equal success...blah blah blah.”

I asked several of my friends if they cringed sometimes when they heard the “G” word. Surprisingly enough, most did, even ones who were successful.

So I invited twelve of them over to my house to join in a Thoughtstorm® on why we resist making goals.

A Thoughtstorm® is a powerful “thinking party” in which many minds join to explore a question from many angles. As the question is seen from many dimensions, “linking” occurs, and a deep level of intuitive, creative thinking unfolds. Each person adds input. The energy builds. Eventually someone blurts out a powerful concept. When it’s spoken, there is a ripple of recognition through the group. A gut-level “aha!” We call this core concept a “corecept,” and the power of it can change life paradigms.

The first question we asked was, “How do you know you are aligned with a goal?” In other words, how the heck do we know what in Sam Hill we really want? Joseph Campbell advised us to “follow our bliss.” Lots of us would love to, but we can’t seem to find out what car our bliss is riding in to even get on the same highway with it!

We began to add input: You know you’re aligned with a goal when...you feel it...you don’t care what others think...you have very little doubt...it makes you happy...it draws you...it energizes you...you begin to notice synchronicities...you see opportunities.... And finally someone blurted the words “It gives you life.”

We all felt the truth ring in that one! A good goal for us fills us with vitality, with excitement, with life. Thinking about it “juices” us. It’s not a “duty” goal. It’s a life-exciting goal.

So, here is this incredible goal, that brings us to life, and why do we resist making goals? The input began to come in. Fear of commitment... fear of failure...fear of success...fear of change, confusion, chaos...fear of making the wrong goal, of making a mistake...fear of being a beginner... fear of losing something...fear of changing identities....

The gears shifted and we hit a deeper level of answer: fear of being consumed by the goal and fear of the journey!

We realized at that moment that when we really do make a real goal, we do become consumed by it. Then we had to laugh. If the goal is what we really want, the kind of goal that “gives us life,” why not fall into that? Why not be consumed by it? What a way to live! What a paradox! The most satisfying way to live is to dive into a goal we love!

We began to think of people: Mother Teresa, Pablo Casals, Albert Einstein, Barbara Jordan, Buckminster Fuller, Shirley McLain, Albert Schweitzer, Joseph Campbell, Oprah Winfrey, Gandhi, Stephen Speilberg, Robin Williams, Ram Dass as well as many people in our community that we know personally.

It’s obvious these people are creators, not survivors! The final object isn’t money, although there may be money involved. Money becomes the tool for the passion, not the passion itself. Money becomes the paintbrush with which to paint the experience of life, rather than a fortress of protection.

I don’t resist making goals anymore. I hang a list up for a year that has on it the small stuff like “try in-line skating” to the big stuff, like, “new house.” I cross off the ones I achieve, because it’s empowering to take a win. I celebrate victory!

Cata Low, Austin, Texas

The following criteria for evaluating the “bliss factor” of personal goals is the best I have found so far. It was developed by Harry Palmer, founder of the Avatar® materials.

STEP 1. Choose a goal that interests you.

STEP 2. Rate the goal on a scale of 1 (doubtful) to 5 (certain) with the following criteria:

a. The goal invites your attention and interest. Thinking about it renews your strength.

b. Pursuit of the goal produces something of value to you.

c. The goal offers benefits to others equal to your own.

d. The goal presents an opportunity for self-development (greater competence, understanding, responsibility, etc.).

e. The goal is a recognizable step to a greater goal.

f. The goal allows personal creativity and some degree of self management.

g. The goal presents the opportunity for personal recognition and some receipt of others’ admiration.

STEP 3. Add the answers together. If the total is between 25 and 35, it’s a star to steer by. If it rated 15 to 25, how could the goal be modified to rate higher? If it scored below 15, it’s not really your goal.

Making Friends With the G-Word

Celebrate Life-Giving Goals!

by Cata Low

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