by Jerry Summitt
One day, for some reason, I became a seeker. I developed a deep desire to understand myself and this world that I live in. I had so many questions. Why are some people so lucky? Why are some people so successful? Why do some people seem to have nothing but bad luck? Why do some people suffer so much? Is life like a poker game? Do some people get a full house, and others get nothing merely by chance? I intuitively felt that life was not a roll of the dice and thus began a search to understand the reasons for the sufferings and the successes of the world. The goal: Enlightenment.
Many people have found the answers they seek through religion, however religion didn’t provide all the answers I was looking for. One day I was rummaging through my grandmother’s library and discovered a book on metaphysics. This was an exciting discovery! Metaphysics is a branch of philosophy dealing with the first principle of things. One metaphysical principle says that what you believe and think about determines what you experience. This made sense! I reflected on my past experiences, and it became clear to me that we are much more in control of our lives than many of us realize. I started to consciously apply this principle in my life and found that it always seemed to work. I got what I expected to get.
I realized that faith was the key. I had to believe in something for which I had no evidence. To consciously apply this metaphysical principle required faith. I also realized that fears and doubts are a negative form of faith. Believe in something without a doubt, and you will create evidence.
I was making progress on my search, but there still was something missing. I felt like I knew something I couldn’t describe. I felt the need to express this knowing feeling which was difficult to put into words. I wanted to know that I know! Then along came Avatar.
I received an Avatar Journal in the mail. As I read it, it made sense because it was based on a metaphysical principle that I believed to be true. Avatar says that it is your beliefs that cause you to create or attract the experiences you are having. However, Avatar promised something more than metaphysics. It promised an experiential understanding of how this process works.
At first, I decided Avatar probably wouldn’t teach me anything I didn’t already know. I thought, I’m happy and enjoying life so why should I spend $2000 to learn something I probably already knew? So, I forgot about it for a while and continued to search for more answers to the deep questions I had. The Avatar Journals kept coming, and I became more intrigued. I finally decided to take the course a year after I received my first Avatar Journal.
For me, taking The Avatar Course was like solving a riddle. I realized that I did know, however this knowing was deeper than intellectual description. It was a feeling. The distinction between feeling and thinking became very clear.
The riddle I solved was this: I had the belief that the answer I was looking for could be described in words. I was trapped by my intellect. I was caught up in a world of thoughts and beliefs trying to know the answers. Avatar reminded me that I am the creator of those thoughts and beliefs. The truth I was seeking wasn’t in the thoughts and beliefs, but at the source of the thoughts and beliefs. This source can only be experienced.
Avatar helped me to understand the paradox: what I am looking for is what I am looking with. To attempt to describe this using words is like trying to kiss your own lips.
I had made an awesome discovery, but it was also a trap. You see, I had defined enlightenment incorrectly. I believed that an enlightened person should be able to eliminate all the pain, suffering, and fear from their life and replace it with joy and happiness. I wanted to keep the highs and eliminate the lows. It was like trying to keep the mountains and eliminate the valleys, never realizing they are interdependent and one cannot exist without the other.
I lacked the experience to understand what would truly bring joy and fulfillment into my life. It seems to me our society tends to con us into pursuing goals that really aren’t fulfilling. I soon learned that the ability to live deliberately can be a double-edged sword if you don’t have the wisdom to know what to create. Be careful what you ask for because you just might get it.
I stopped resisting and allowed myself to really experience what was happening. The insights gained through this were tremendous.
Since Avatar, I have a new definition of enlightenment. It’s the understanding of the process of how we evolve through the experiences that we create. From my viewpoint, an enlightened person is not immune from pain and suffering, however they don’t get caught up in the drama of it all. They can clearly distinguish between the experience and the experiencer. They are nonjudgmental and live with integrity. They understand that sometimes we tend to avoid the experiences that are most necessary for our evolution. They realize the spectrum of possible human experience is infinite, and this is what makes life exciting. And they realize their power lies in their ability to live deliberately, to enjoy the way.
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