by Kathy Gulrich
Have you ever wanted something so badly that you couldn’t even get yourself to say it out loud? Have you ever had a goal that scared you even more than it excited you? A couple years ago I did. For me, it all boiled down to a single word: artist.
Yep, artist. I couldn’t get it out of my mouth. I had no trouble saying it about other people, no problem. But about myself? No way.
The irony of it all was that I was a pretty successful potter at the time. I’d created some really beautiful pieces. I had sold my work at a Manhattan art gallery and even at the American Craft Museum. But in my heart of hearts, I was no artist. A potter, sure. Maybe even a talented potter. (Certainly a lucky potter.) But not an artist.
Pablo Picasso said, “Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist after one grows up.”
Where was my disconnect?
Picasso was right. When I was a kid, I had no trouble at all thinking of myself as an artist. I remember a painting I did in second or third grade: Eskimos ice fishing. I thought it was great until someone told me it was just okay. I don’t even remember who made the comment. But I do remember how bad it made me feel. And some 40 years later, I can still feel that disappointment, that hurt.
That incident may have given way to my first limiting belief about being an artist. But it certainly wasn’t my last.
“Art is too risky.” “It’s too late to start.” “Artists never make any money.” “It’s okay for a hobby, but not as a profession” “You’ve got to suffer to make real art.” Need I go on?
By the time I’d started making pottery, I had so many limiting beliefs I knew I could never be an artist. So I wasn’t.
Fortunately, Avatar found its way into my life. And during The Avatar Master Course, I found the courage to tackle the issue that was probably closest to my soul: Kathy the artist.
Scary? Oh, yeah. But one morning. about halfway through the course, I knew I was ready. So I stepped up to the plate for one of the group exercises, and I literally blew away all my limiting beliefs. I felt lighter and brighter. It was incredible. For the first time in my adult life, I was an artist!
More than a year later, it’s still incredible. In addition to my pottery, I’m now doing watercolors. I’ve just signed up for a drawing class, and I’ve opened my soul to my next art adventure, whatever it might be. But that’s just the half of it.
Through this experience, I’ve learned to trust that the Avatar tools can help me create not just art, but whatever I prefer in my life. All I need to do is find the courage to go for it!
Kathy Gulrich, New York
return to issue 14.3 | return to Journal archives | top of page
All content copyright 2008, Star’s Edge, Inc. EPC is a service mark of Star's Edge, Inc. Avatar®, ReSurfacing®, Thoughtstorm®, Love Precious Humanity®, Enlightened Planetary Civilization® and Star’s Edge International® are registered trademarks of Star’s Edge, Inc. All rights reserved.